Comments on: Discipline Without Anger

By: Positive Discipline Techniques | They Grow Up So Fast

Positive Discipline Techniques | They Grow Up So Fast — Wed, 06 Jul 2011 08:48:35 +0000

[...] how do you discipline without harshness? And what techniques will bring about the best and most positive responses from your [...]

By: wildcatteacher

wildcatteacher — Mon, 28 Sep 2009 17:57:59 +0000

Good thoughts. I have more thoughts on this issue of discipline vs. punishment at http://growingupwell.org/category/discipline/

By: Tim

Tim — Wed, 07 Jun 2006 18:09:22 +0000

This generated a train of thoughts that overran the bounds of a comment. See “Conflicts (that are) of Interest” for my thoughts on this. – Tim

By: litlove

litlove — Wed, 07 Jun 2006 17:35:42 +0000

One other point – my sister-in-law says that it’s important her children should see her angry with them and annoyed. She says they must realise that even people close to you have feelings and will express them, and that types of behaviour have consequences. She says its more valuable for them to know that after a fight things go back to normal, and it’s all forgotten. It’s a good point, too. Show me a mother who hasn’t got a ‘nuclear’ button…..! Everyone loses it sometimes.

By: Tim

Tim — Mon, 05 Jun 2006 17:36:17 +0000

Good points from both. Unfortunately, I’ve played the villian role all too often, both as a parent and as a manager. Even more unfortunate, I haven’t been able to zero in on the “provoke button” that seems to set me off. (I’ve tended to write it off to my youngest son have a personality too much like my own.) Even so, I hope I’ve broken those habits soundly enough to be raising sons and not victims, and that their parenting will be more like what mine is today, and not as much what it was in the past. Thanks for the input! – Tim

By: Scott Pruett

Scott Pruett — Mon, 05 Jun 2006 17:31:53 +0000

Another problem is that if the discipline is done in an unmeasured way or with an ugly attitude, then you will only end up looking like the villian and the intended lesson will be lost. No matter how guilty someone might be, if they are ridiculed, nagged, or yelled at (with or without formal discipline) then they will come off feeling more like a persecuted victim than a target of justice.

By: litlove

litlove — Sun, 04 Jun 2006 13:48:47 +0000

Great post. I know as a mother I can get a grip on myself quickest by recognising I can be an angry adult and, at the same time, a mother who needs to deal with a situation. If you can split the problem from the emotions it arouses, there is hope… Also it can be very enlightening to figure out exactly why some things in particular feel provocative. They pretty much always hark back to treatment we received ourselves as children, and as such indicate a momentary regression in our own characters rather than a sensible response.