Here are portions of what I wrote on the 48 Hour Film Project blog:

Along the way, I think we might have an entertaining movie, but it was the by-product, and not the point.

Background: This is our second video project, the first having been the 5-minute video that my older son and I shot over Father’s Day weekend. Neither of us have any significant photography or video experience. We had no idea what we couldn’t do, so we just jumped in and figured out ways to make it work. Maybe if we were smarter, we’d have been too fearful to have jumped in this way.

The Good

Our Friday-night plot & story collaboration session had a wild disparity of political views, personalities, and ages. It went amazingly well. By midnight, we had a solid story, with good understanding of the various characters, simple staging, and something that would fit the 7-minute limit. I stated early on that I would much prefer for us to have a great story, marred by technical issues than to have a technically excellent presentation of a mediocre story.

The Better

One of our crew members loves to cook, and agreed to provide meals for all three mealtimes on Saturday, and they were FULL meals, including coffee cake & cheese & sausage grits Saturday morning, humongous burritos for lunch, and sandwiches with Oreo cheesecake to end the day. She had veggies, sweets, snacks… you can’t imagine a Hollywood production having better food on the set. Really. I was blown away.

The Best

In spite of having nobody on our team having any significant experience with film/video projects, I split people up into three teams: Script/Story Development, Cinematography/Storyboarding, and Props/Supplies. I let everyone start working, and went to scout locations, based on the plot. I did this because after a few minutes, I realized that they didn’t need me looking over their shoulders, and my presence just slowed them down.

Because of some casting and technical issues, we didn’t start filming until 3:30 PM on Saturday. However, by 9:00 PM, we had all of our video except for the one indoor sequence (the opening, getting-ready scene), and we shot that with just a couple of people involved. Or script/story team had not only come up with the dialog and stage directions, a teenage member of the team had used some public-domain software for formatting everything in traditional “movie screenplay” format. We ran off copies for the entire crew, so everyone had this wonderfully formatted document with all the important details of the story.

Around midnight, my son and and I started editing, taking turns getting sleepy and getting all the audio & video tracks synchronized. We used iMovie for NLE, which probably made things more complicated than if we’d used Final Cut, but ultimately, all we really needed were some simple transitions, and the ability to bring together video clips, a single channel of external audio, and the music/foley track.

One of our story collaborators was also our music composer, so by midnight on Friday, he had a decent idea of what we were doing. Unfortunately, he had commitments on Saturday that kept him from doing anything until late Saturday night. (This is the same guy who is our church’s worship leader.) He started working around 11:00 PM on Saturday, and had all the music done by 1:30 AM. Unfortunately, I had his Macbook Pro, so he wasn’t able to convert the songs into MP3s and email them. I picked them up around 7:30AM on Sunday, came home to do some more editing, and then we went to church, brought fast-food lunch home, and had a decent cut on tape by 4:30. My son and I spent the rest of the time tweaking things. As someone later told us, “you’re never finished, you just get to a point where you have to stop.”

On the Bus

One of my best friends says that the right way to do something involving a team is to make sure you’ve got the right people on the bus, and then decide where to go. I was fortunate to have a lot of smart people, which made the whole weekend a lot of fun.

Clicking on the link above will take you to Google Maps, and will display a zoomed-in version of where my family usually watches the fireworks. Parking is a completely different story, but can’t be generalized because it depends so much on where you’re headed after the show.

If you’re there Saturday, and see someone who looks suspiciously like me (accompanied by some women and a couple of large young men–my nephews), say “Hey.”

Here’s the text:

Arrrrr!

My youngest son sat upright on the couch as if he’d been shocked by electricity. Without warning, he shouted out (in a perfect Schwarzenegger voice), “It’s not a Toomer!”*

I nearly fell out of my chair laughing.

* My son was parodying this scene from “Kindergarten Cop”:

…I’m the last of the big time spenders
And I’ve been spendin’ time on you,

An eternal truth that’s too easy to forget is that money is distributed unevenly, but time is doled out in equal amounts. None of us get more than 60 minutes in an hour, 24 hours in a day, or 365 days in a year.

Recently, a very good friend remembered my love of “Hook,” the Robin Williams & Dustin Hoffman version of the Peter Pan story, and bought the DVD for me for my birthday. The most significant reason I love this movie? It’s a constant reminder to spend time with my sons, and more important, how I should spend that time.

Buddy, Can You Spare Some Time?
You have 24 hours to spend today. How are you going to spend it? How have you spent it so far?

If you woke up at 6:00 AM (like I did), you’re now down to 18 hours. Going to bed before midnight? Subtract a few more. What’s left? (I’m still at 18 )Are you working an 8-hour day? (Yes, with about 90 minutes of commute time.) What’s left now? (About 8.5 hours.) How much of that will involve your children?

My youngest son gets up at 7:00 AM. Yesterday, I noticed that there were a bunch of things (showering, gathering up gym clothes, getting dressed) that I have been doing between 7:00 and 7:30 (when I leave for work) that I could do before 7:00. I restructured my schedule, and now make sure I’ve done those things before he’s awake, so he and I can spend that time eating breakfast, watching ESPN, talking football, or whatever he takes a notion to do.

Not for Mature Audiences
What do we do on mornings like this? Sometimes, we just enjoy some good, old-fashioned, juvenile humor. Sometimes we don’t say much of anything, and sometimes we talk in-depth about any number of subjects. The point isn’t that we talk about meaningful or important things… the point is that we have time to talk, and that my son gets to determine (to a large degree) how we spend it.

In addition to “Hook” reminding me to spend time with my sons, it reminds to stop being a grown-up all the time. Think about how you typically respond to a tiny baby. Do you use baby talk, play simple (age-appropriate) games like peek-a-boo? Are you gentle and tender? If so, you’re modifying your own behavior to mesh with the child and establish communication.

Why do we stop doing this when our kids become toddlers?

Why is it that I’m frequently criticized for “acting like a kid” with my sons? On a regular basis, people will comment (generally to my wife) about the three of us roughhousing in some public place, laughing too loud, or otherwise causing commotion. Why is it that so many are unable to see the value in being “in the moment” with your child, even if that means acting completely goofy or doing something seriously immature?

Walking the Fine Line
To be sure, there are times that you must be the parent, not be a child, and must consider the lessons that your children are learning from your behavior. Without question they should be able to look at you, and develop a sense of appropriate adult behavior.

Unfortunately, it takes very little time to demonstrate these things, and a reasonably intelligent child can learn those lessons with just a little bit of “adult” behavior every day. How much time do you spend in “adult mode” around your children, as opposed to getting down on the floor and playing with them (or tackling them, or laughing/tickling them, or… you get the idea)?

What are You Investing in?
So if I ask you what your investment in your children is, do you immediately think of how much is in their education fund, how much you’ll spend on their car, or what it costs to raise/feed/clothe a typical child in today’s world? Or, do you immediately think of countless hours you’ve spent at the ball field, laughing around the dinner table, working on school projects, or just silly stuff with your kids? Do you take more pride in the dollars you invest in your child, or the hours?

I’ll make a deal with you. Take one week, and look for 30 minutes each day when you can just hang out with your kids. When they flip over to “South Park” (or whatever show they watch that you’d rather not), put down your book and see what they respond to. Do they laugh at “Mind of Mencia?” Do you know why they’re laughing? Are you wanting to laugh, but worried that you need to put your “I’m mature” hat on instead?

Come on. Step across that line and spend 30 minutes a day. I dare you. I double-dog dare you to cross that fine line, and be a kid again. I bet ya my next week’s allowance that you won’t regret it.

At my house? At my house, you get the gift that keeps on giving: embarrassment.

The Sunday Afternoon (not Saturday Night) Special
On Sunday, as is our family custom, we went to a local Mexican restaurant for lunch. It’s a casual place, with good food at very reasonable prices.

Just outside of the restaurant is the parking area in front, adjacent to some outdoor seating under a canopy. We considered dining outside, but when we walked in, there was nobody there, so we assumed it might be closed.

After dinner, I was paying the check and talking to my youngest son. My wife and oldest son went out to the van. As I was signing the credit card slip, my youngest son went out to join them, and a moment later, I was on my way out.

Mother’s Day was a Gas
When I got to the sidewalk, I noticed that all three of them were hiding behind the van. They weren’t hiding well enough for me to not see them, but were just crouched down on the far side, away from the outdoor seating area. As I puzzled over this, I noticed that there were now several tables full of people sitting outside.

I reach the van, unlock the doors, and the three of them rush into their seats. “What’s going on? Why were you hiding?”

My oldest replied, “Well, as Mom and I were walking out, I didn’t realize that there were people at these tables, and way too loudly said ‘I know when I get to work today, I’m going to have to poop. It happens every day.’ And no, I didn’t notice all those people sitting there, so Mom ran around to hide behind the van, and I came over here with her.”

I looked at my youngest to see what his story was.

“Well,” he began, “when I came out, they were already hiding, but I didn’t know why. So I snuck around to get the story. When they told me, I started laughing so hard I farted, and I think the people at the tables heard that too.”

We all laughed, and then got quiet as I pulled out of the parking lot. I finally broke the silence.

“Happy Mother’s Day.”

What I do know is that today was a fabulous day to own a convertible, find a winding road, and let nature (and the steering wheel) take its course. Your mileage may vary.

P.S. Please excuse the tie (I was on my way back to the office from a funeral) and the long hair. I promise to get it cut soon.